idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
