he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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