if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
are you so shy because you have an std?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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