'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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