My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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