remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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