I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
