i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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