i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
