Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize