Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize