Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize