you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
