Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Alive.
So much puke
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
MIDGETS
????
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize