Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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