Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
