we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Floor bacon is actually really good
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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