We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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