I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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