she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
