he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize
