okay pat passed out under dana's car
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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