thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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