I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize