You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
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