brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
