He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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