yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
