With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
