READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
