Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
