i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Randomize
