I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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