ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize