guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
