i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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