U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
im drinking this country out of the recession.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
