Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
