So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
why do cheetos always look like penises
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
