Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
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