Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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