hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
