i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
