i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
