So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize