The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
i've created a new STD.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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