so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
