we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
