Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
a search helicopter?!
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
