is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
